Relationships around the holidays get really rocky. I mean really rocky. Statistics have shown that two weeks before Christmas is the most popular time for couples to break up. (Source) Between, shopping for presents, deciding what the budget will be, where to spend Christmas, rifts between family members and your significant other; things can get tense way too quickly.
On the other hand, this is the time of “love being in the air”. Many single women are looking for someone to kiss under the mistletoe, someone to kiss when the ball drops on New Year’s Eve. They become entranced in the thought of love and often go out of their way to make a relationship happen. Not only that but often times, family members seem to think that their young relatives should have a boyfriend or fiance accompanying them to any holiday gathering. This is often very detrimental to the young women; not only does it tear at the relationship between the family member and the young woman due to the constant pressure but it also sets the young women up for failure when she’s looking for love and only finds disappointment.
So either way you fall, whether being in a relationship or single, the holidays can take a toll on everyone. Here are some tips to keep your heart safe during the holidays:
Tips if you’re single:
1. Do not let your sight fall from God. He is your number one man and He is the reason for the season. Know matter how much you think you do, you do not need a man to get you through the holiday season.
2. Your family members really do love you. They pressure you because they think having a boyfriend/fiance will make you happier than you are now. (Let me tell you, that is so not always true.) Make sure you know that you appreciate their kind wishes. They don’t mean you ill will.
3. Don’t let lonely guys have your affection (unless they’re really sincere!!!) A lot of guys are lonely around the holidays too. They have the same pressures we do.
4. Don’t discount getting to know someone. Just because it’s not advisable to jump head in to a relationship with someone during the holidays does not mean you can’t get to know someone.
5. SMILE. If you’re looking for love, no matter when you find it, how is your future someone supposed to see you for you if they don’t see you smile?!
Tips if you’re in a relationship:
1. Be patient. Your significant other is probably putting in extra thought to your gift and the gifts of many others which is causing him to struggle financially.
2. Be kind to all of his family. (Yes, even the ones who drive you completely nuts.) I know it’s hard but these people actually mean something to him, and by offending them you offend and embarrass him.
3. Speak what’s on your mind. Let him know what you’re feeling. Don’t hide your feelings. The less communication between the two of you, the more likely you are to break up due to strife.
4. Give him your wish list. Boys have a hard time finding the right gift for their special girl. They wonder and struggle and compare gifts until no end. It makes it so much easier on him if you help him out a little.
5. Take time to just be together. No talking of plans, presents, no distractions, just you and your honey. No movies!! This doesn’t give you any time to talk to one another. Play a board game, make dinner together, go sledding. Do something together that you can have open communication through.
I’m personally looking forward to spending my first Christmas with my fiance this year. It will be interesting to say in the least as we are facing some of the same problems as addressed in this post. I guess I should take my own advice!
What are you doing for the holidays this year?